Babies still

Monday mornings are a drag. Since the husband moved out of the city for work, they’ve become worse. It’s sad when he can’t fly home for the weekend; it’s sadder when he does. He leaves early in the morning and the kids wake up to find him gone.
Today, N who seems to be extra sensitive to his departure, woke up unusually cranky and reluctant. Despite my efforts to cheer her up she seemed determined to pull us all down. With less than five hours of sleep I was
near snapping point.

 

However, when she said she was too tired to get up I simply picked her up and carried her to the washroom. It had been a long time since I had carried her and the ‘hug’ felt good. Mercifully, even at nine years, she’s yet not too heavy for me, this little one of mine. (H almost knocks me over when he clambers
on, which he does often).

She seemed to cheer up a bit and so I offered to give her a bath just like when she
was a baby. We spent a happy ten minutes in the washroom falling back into our old old pattern, splashing water on her while she tried to wet me and I pretended to be angry.

By the time I was helping her into her clothes laughing together, she had forgotten her crankiness and so had I. She finished her breakfast ‘even faster than H’. We went down to the bus-stop happier than I could have ever hoped for.

Sometimes children just need to be babies, to be pampered silly, their tiny whims catered to. We often find it difficult to come to terms with the fact that our children are growing up. However, just as often, we take their growing up for granted. Some days it helps to remember that grown up as they seem, they are babies still.

Disclaimer: A post like this in no way means I’m a sane centred zen mama. Most days I’m the regular harridan. It’s just that I blog about the good days because it is heartening to remember that once in a while I can avert the bad ones.

Linking up to Microblog Mondays. We’re talking about space travel. Do leave your thoughts there.

 

10 things to remember on a journey without kids

I had often wondered if/when I could ever leave the children and travel on my own. Well, finally it happened. As it turns out the Husband was home and it was just four days (out of which two were over the weekend). 

Off I went.

It felt weird – to say the least – to be travelling without two small hands to hold on to. If you’re a mum too and have forgotten quite what it’s like to travel alone you might find these pointers useful.

1. It’s normal to carry just a single piece of baggage. Nah, you haven’t forgotten anything. And it’s not even important whether the bag is pink, blue or yellow.

2. On the flight, you are not allowed to cuddle people sitting on either side of you (to be on the safe side, keep your hands off the hand rests).

3. If your boarding pass says window seat, you actually get to sit at the window.

4. You can survive a two-hour flight without a visit to the loo. As a bonus – you also survive take offs and landings without admonishing your neighbours to ‘hold it in’ even while wondering anxiously if they will hold it in.

5. You can get through a flight without a single apology.

6. You don’t need to ask the airline staff for favours – no change of seats, no extra water, no extra tissues to mop off said water.

7. Airport shopping zones are a grossly misunderstood lot. Far from the disaster-waiting-to-happen-zones you thought them, they make for blissful browsing.

8. You get to decide what you want to do on the flight – reading, listening to music and sleeping being real options (over visiting loos, ensuring co-passengers don’t get kicked/ pushed, mopping messes and refereeing seats).

9. The baggage carousal is just that – a baggage carousal, not a forbidden slide you cannot allow your kid on.

10. A two hour flight is way too long. After a point you don’t quite know what to do with yourself.

A last bit of advice. Sit back, relax and try to enjoy yourself just as much as the kids are enjoying your absence back home.

Linking to ABC Wednesday for the letter ‘J’ for Journey. Joyful thanks to Mrs Nesbitt who thought up this wonderful meme.

When hugs get few and far between!

Sometime back I needed to pick up a gift for one of the kids’ friends. I took the children along with the understanding that we WOULDN’T be shopping for them. However, the obvious happened. H found something he just had to have. N somehow never troubles me as much as he does. While she sulked quietly H threw a full fledged tantrum. We had a big blow up and walked out of the shop. A few slices of pizza later, when all was forgiven I put out my arms for a hug. And H refused. Simply refused.

“No hugs or kisses when we’re out of home, mama,” said he biting off a huge slice of pizza. “Only high fives,” he added putting out his hand as a concession to my bewildered look (or was it to ward me off?).

This is H – the cuddle freak. H who could be soothed with a hug even at few weeks old, who would sleep for hours on end as a newborn as long as I held him tight, who would snuggle endlessly and when I’d try to move he’d say ‘I can’t let go we’re in a permanent huggie.’ And my heart would totally melt making me wonder why I ever wanted to get up at all.

He was refusing me a hug. My son has officially entered the tweens and he’s not nine yet.

It’s strange how kids change. While H the born hugger is suddenly conscious of his big boy status N, the one who often howled to be put down in her crib and enjoyed being left to herself as a was baby, is growing more and more cuddlesome, even in public.

For now, I’m just glad I get to hug both my kids at least at home. Mercifully H’s hug embargo doesn’t exist at home. However, this does make me wonder if sometime in the distant future there exists a day when he’ll say no to hugs completely. That will be a sad day indeed, though I have no intentions of going down without a fight.

Wonder if they turn back into huggers once the awkward teens are through. 

Linking to ABC Wednesday for the letter H. Do drop by to see other H posts.

Where did my babies go?

Warm cuddly nights

A tiny hand wrapped around my finger
Baby hands reaching out for me
A spark of recognition in a bright pair of eyes
A toothless smile
Uncertain feet staggering around
A lisped out ‘mama
A tight hug after the first day at school
An invisible hurt that needed a caress
The best of time.
Then they grew up and all of that seemed a dream.‘I can make my own ponytail,’ she insists.
No hugs at the bus stop, please mama,’ says he.
You don’t need to watch us while we play,’ they roll their eyes!
No longer do they follow me around.
No longer am I needed all the while.

Where did my ‘babies’ go?

And then I see..
A half tucked in t-shirt needing attention.
‘Combed’ hair that refuses to sit.
A small hand tightening in mine as a dog strays too close
The call of ‘Come na ma‘ as they dance to crazy music
A ‘You have to read this one, mama.
A ‘just like that’ hug when I least expect it
That’s when I find them again.
Yes they’ll need me –
For cheering at the football match
For clapping at their graduation
For blowing up when they stay out late
For celebrating their first jobs
For crying at their weddings
For pampering their children
For that hug they’ll want but might not ask forYes they’ll need me always

and they’ll remain … my babies.Always!

Sending out warm wishes to everyone on Valentine’s Day. Hope you have a warm and wonderful time with your loved ones.

#Microblog Mondays – Chests and Breasts!

“I want to run at the Pinkathon too”, said H this weekend. I spoke about how I was participating in it here and H got all excited too.

“You cannot”, said I, “it’s for women only”.
“Why?” 
“Well because the race is to generate awareness about breast cancer and only women get breast cancer so the race is for women only.”
“Why don’t men get breast cancer?”
“Because men don’t have breasts.”
“But I have a breast”, said H pointing to his….well chest.

Apparently this is something I’d overlooked, using the unisex ‘chest’ rather than ‘breast’ when talking to the kids and they ended up using them interchangeably.

“Ummm.. That’s your chest, not a ‘breast’ “, said I struggling to explain the difference. 

After a long drawn out explanation H finally caught on. Then nodding his head wisely he summed it up – “Oh so women have breasts on their chests and men just have chests.” 

Yeah right.

Linking to # Microblog Mondays hosted by Stirrup Queens.

Edited to add: Going by the comments that breast cancer was not so uncommon among men any longer I decided to pass on the information to H. Here’s what he had to say..
“So some men get it too?”
“Yes.”
“Do some men also have a uterus?”
“No, they don’t.”
“Can you tell me a few diseases that ONLY men get?”

I’m off now..