The rendezvous

8pm.
‘They’re late’, thought she as she laid the table. Impatiently she glanced at
the clock. ‘I’ll be late… again’. She hated to be late. But then, a smile lit
her face as she thought about her nightly tryst with her … ‘friend’ well yes,
friend, love, companion. She relived that heady feeling; that touch of the
evening breeze on her skin – cool and refreshing in the summer, arctic crisp in
the winter; the intoxicating scent of summer tube roses that kept them company
or the Chrysanthemums that filled the winter nights with their fragrance. And
there was music, ah yes, the music had to be just right.

She
smiled to herself then shook her head to dispel the image – later, she told
herself firmly, it’ll have to wait. Only after dinner could she give in to her
passion. First, she was a mum, a wife.

As
if on cue, the kids rushed in.

‘Hurry
hurry’, said she. ‘Wash and change. Dinner’s at the table’. Half an hour later
as the Husband settled down to the day’s news before the telly, she tucked the
kids in and kissed them good night.

Free
at last, she walked out of her apartment, out in the open air for her nightly
rendezvous – that one hour of pure, selfish happiness – hers and hers alone –
with her love, her friend. She sniffed the fresh air with pleasured
anticipation then reached for her iPod. Her friend was before her, waiting. ‘I’ve
come,’ said she breathlessly, as the road stretched ahead – silent, inviting,
encouraging.

She
ran then, the pounding of her feet matched by the hammering of her heart,
drowning herself in the pure pleasure of the adrenalin rush of her run,
forgetting everything else – just she and the road, her love for all seasons.

So do you have a secret hobby too? Or maybe not a secret, but something special that you do ONLY for yourself? To unwind, to have fun – just fun? Do share here.

Linking to Blog-A-Rhythm’s Wordy Wednesday.

Where did my babies go?

Warm cuddly nights

A tiny hand wrapped around my finger
Baby hands reaching out for me
A spark of recognition in a bright pair of eyes
A toothless smile
Uncertain feet staggering around
A lisped out ‘mama
A tight hug after the first day at school
An invisible hurt that needed a caress
The best of time.
Then they grew up and all of that seemed a dream.‘I can make my own ponytail,’ she insists.
No hugs at the bus stop, please mama,’ says he.
You don’t need to watch us while we play,’ they roll their eyes!
No longer do they follow me around.
No longer am I needed all the while.

Where did my ‘babies’ go?

And then I see..
A half tucked in t-shirt needing attention.
‘Combed’ hair that refuses to sit.
A small hand tightening in mine as a dog strays too close
The call of ‘Come na ma‘ as they dance to crazy music
A ‘You have to read this one, mama.
A ‘just like that’ hug when I least expect it
That’s when I find them again.
Yes they’ll need me –
For cheering at the football match
For clapping at their graduation
For blowing up when they stay out late
For celebrating their first jobs
For crying at their weddings
For pampering their children
For that hug they’ll want but might not ask forYes they’ll need me always

and they’ll remain … my babies.Always!

Sending out warm wishes to everyone on Valentine’s Day. Hope you have a warm and wonderful time with your loved ones.

Girls and boys are good for each other

H is intensely competitive, specially when it comes to N. He likes to think that anything she can do, he can do better. However, at the same time he has quite a dislike for all things he has labelled ‘girly’. So it was with a bit of surprise that I discovered him making loom bands the other day. Apparently his competitiveness won over his dislike for ‘girly’ stuff. 

ENGROSSED!!

Even at 8.5 years he is clumsy as ever and can do with some hand-eye coordination practice, as also with a hobby that involves him keeping quiet and sitting in one place for some amount of time (other than watching the telly). I was one happy mum :-).

Linking to Mel’s # Microblog Mondays . Do drop by to see how others are faring after the weekend.

Also, linking to ABC Wednesday for the letter E for Engrossed.

*********

On a somewhat related note I stumbled across this debate here on the Net about whether boys and girls learn best if they are segregated in single sex classrooms.

Research suggests children perform better in single-sex classrooms. Some maintain that the teaching pattern is skewed in favour of girls since sitting in organised classrooms works well for them while boys are better at hands on learning.

However as a mom to a pair of different sex twins I find myself disagreeing. Of course life would be much simpler with same sex kids, just as it would be easier with single sex children in a classroom. However the education we’re aiming at doesn’t have only to do with scores, is it? Boys and girls are different, that’s a fact. Their brains are wired differently, also a fact. Out of the classroom they have to live, love, compete and socialise with each other. The earlier they learn how to do that, the better.

H and N fight. A lot. Yet they have been teaching and learning from each other with no awareness of it. Without going into whether an ability is a ‘boy skill’ or a ‘girl skill, here’s how..

H might continue to be a Barbie destroyer but he has mastered plaiting their hair albeit shabbily, he knows how to make loom bands and, wonder of wonders, often remembers to put down the toilet seat! He makes an effort at drawing, crafting, singing and dancing again thanks to N.

As for N, she’s as girly as girls come but can throw a mean punch, enjoys computer games and is addicted to the outdoors perhaps even more than H.

Together they’re good!

Learnings from the A to Z Challenge

April might not be the next month but the sign up list for this year’s A to Z April Bolgging Challenge is open. You can take a look here. Isn’t that badge really cool? 

Last year after much coaxing and deliberation I participated in the Challenge. I shy away from everyday monthly challenges because, well because they require posting everyday for one whole month. By the end of the month you find yourself dying to get out of it and the quality of your blog posts goes down too.

However, the April A to Z Challenge turned out way more fun than I’d imagined.

Sharing some of my learnings from the experience. If you’ve done it before you know them all. If you’re a first timer you might find them useful.

1. If I were to give one single advice to a first timer at the A to Z Challenge it would be SCHEDULE YOUR POSTS. The Challenge isn’t just about writing. It is about visiting and discovering other blogs, about making friends and coming away with a wealth of reading material. If you have your posts all done beforehand you have the luxury of reading and commenting on other blogs.

2. KEEP THEM SHORT.. 300-500 words. This is a toughie for me. I found myself constantly struggling to chop my posts if they exceeded the 500 limit I’d set myself. However people are blog hopping like crazy and have many many posts to read. Keeping it short gives you a better chance of being read.

3. HAVE A THEME. It helps you focus when you’re in the ‘what to write’ phase. Contrary to what it seems, broader the canvas more confused your thoughts. What’s better, like many bloggers, it might result in a book later on. Last year I’d talked about 26 of my favourite authors. Before long people were trying to guess what the next alphabet would bring and then I started leaving clues and began to announce the names of people who’d guessed right each day. It turned out to be fun.

4. STICK TO THE CHARACTER OF YOUR BLOG. Make sure your posts resonate with the character of your blog. That’s one big mistake I made last year. I am essentially obsessivemom here. Of course I also have a passion for reading. People who dropped by only during the A to Z Challenge would assume this was a reading/book related blog. Once the challenge was over and I went back to blogging about the twins with an occasional book review thrown in they had a right to be disappointed. It would make sense not to deviate too far from the original character of your blog.

That’s it. Those are my learnings. I do hope I can push myself to take up the madness this year too. It’s fun in retrospect.

Do share your suggestions please, anything to make it easier, more fun. I could do with help.

#Microblog Mondays – Just Do it!

Friends who have been dropping by would know for the past year or so I’ve been hooked to Zumba. I’ve blogged about it often. I can never get over the miracle that I can survive a dance class. Nor can my friends, it seems, since they use every opportunity to pull my leg about it, in a way only comfortable old friends can.

One day after a specially good session I happened to remark, ‘This track I can dance to, in my sleep’. And that was how I put my big fat foot right into my mouth. A little later, when the instructor asked ‘Who knows Bailando and can lead the class today?” I heard a bunch of voices chorusing out a name – yeah mine!

Damn!! Damn!! Damn!! was all my blank mind went while I tried to hide away wishing I would completely disappear. It’s one thing to stand in my inconspicuous corner and do my own thing and quite another to stand right there before the class. It’s like saying just because you can chat up friends you can deliver a speech – not quite the same thing huh?

This here was my nightmare.

However before I could protest, the music had struck up and there I was blundering my way through, forgetting steps I’d done scores of time, steps I knew well, steps that I did pretty well in my small corner! I wish I could say I was suddenly magically perfect like in the movies. I wasn’t. Let me just say I survived and wasn’t booed away. The girls are too sweet.

The best thing though is, that the dreadful dread is gone….. for ever. I might never do it again. But I know I can do it, I did it once, right? That’s so hugely liberating.

We shy off from doing things – fun challenging things – making a huge deal out of them. Sometimes we fear we will be less that perfect, sometimes we’re victims of our own self-image.

Breaking through all of that is freedom.

So from my new-found perspective I can tell you to dance that dance, sing that song, deliver that speech, run that race, get that LBD. Draw, paint, try a trek, take a dip in the sea – as long as you’re having fun and can laugh at yourself, chances are you’ll get by pretty well.

Don’t wait to be earth shattering. Don’t wait to be perfect. Don’t postpone joy.

Linking to for the letter D for ABC Wednesday

And to Mel’s # Microblog Mondays where we’re discussing superpowers. Do drop by.