Finding gratitude during exams

Finding gratitude during exams

And so September bids adieu. And with that come exams – the first ever for the kids. I find myself unable to think of much else while the kids can think of everything else except academics.

I find them reading story books, making song lists, comparing computer game scores and planning ‘what to wear for the dandiya night’. Apparently they have picked up none of my exam anxiety and for that I have learnt to be immensely grateful.
I find I need at least three or four of me to help both of them while keeping them apart and managing the house. Early this week just as the arguments were turning into a complete impasse who should arrive but the husband! I don’t think I was as happy to see him arrive on our wedding day. Was I grateful!
He has such a calming influence on all three of us.
He took the kids out shopping (for all kinds of exam stationery) and they settled down to their studies.
He was only here for five days and was working for four of them yet we were happy to have him home. He’s gone now. And I think we will survive. I am already looking beyond the next 20 days to vacations when we will be travelling to join him.
By the next academic term we hope to be together.
I thought that was all I had for the gratitude post this month but as I write I realise I have more, so much more. Last evening while I was struggling with Marathi lessons with the kids (a language they now know better than me), I was dragged off for an hour of Zumba. I have to admit that one part of me was pretty incredulous that I could leave the kids between their exams for something as frivolous as Zumba. However, it was all for the best because the kids were anyway having a field day laughing at my pronunciations as I tried to quiz them.
And so I am grateful to friends and family who always rally around pulling me for impromptu breakfasts, long morning walks and short evening chats, keeping me sane.
I am now looking forward to October – the latter half of course.
I’d love to know your thoughts on academics and how they effect the kids and you. How important are they? Were they a trial for you when you were young or did you breeze through them? Do you find it difficult to get your kids to study? How different is it from the time you were a child and now?

If I seem overly and rather unnecessarily stressed do forgive me but academics have taken over all of my thoughts of late. Do bear with me for a few weeks.

and with Mel at  Microblog Mondays.

27 Replies to “Finding gratitude during exams”

  1. I think we are wired differently from this generation. While we nearly panicked and had bog anxiety pangs before exams, our kids are as cool as cucumbers. Glad that it's all behind you now. Enjoy and relax till the exams come again 😀

  2. I used to buy stationery on my own before exams. But I also had my lucky pen and pencil always with me 🙂 It used to be so much fun. I loved your post, Tulika. Even with the exam anxiety, it was a happy post. Where are you headed for the vacation? 🙂 I will be in Kurukshetra for Diwali 🙂

    1. Stationery shopping is a family hobby here. We all love it. Ten days to go for the exams still. We're headed to Delhi for Diwali.

  3. Stationery! Yayyyy! I always love kids who splurge on stationery! 😛

    I used to go on a sudden writing spree before my exams in 11th and 12th! It was fun! 😀

    Exams have become more stressful for parents lately. All the mommies in my building seem to disappear during exams!

  4. 🙂 The fun thing about a gratitude list is, it grows as you write it, Tulika! All the best to your kids for the exams! Gosh, life is so different from when I was in school. (I almost wrote "we" there, but stopped myself in time!). Glad you got to that zumba class. And glad you linked up! Hugs!

    1. It sure does grow. I almost didn't write it but once I began I saw more and more things around that made me happy and the list was all done. Happy to link up.

  5. Hi Tulika. I think the modern CCE system has this way of reducing burden on the kids, atleast till class 8. Post that its chaos and mayhem – from our childhoods, revisited….maybe more, since these kids have it sprung on them at a later stage, while we've been groomed and primed to torture from the beginning. Anyway enjoy these wonder years, they'll fly past all to soon, you'll see!

  6. You already know about the exam shenanigans at home as I keep sharing them to death. Yes, academics is on my mind as well. I try to let go but have not been able to do so completely. I do keep telling the younger son to sit and study and also revise some subjects with him. Yeah, the days of the exams are quite tough because I've to juggle so much more. The husband does nothing when it comes to kids' studies. It is totally my responsibility. Well, what do I say? Let the exams be over soon.

    1. Absolutely – that's all I want – let them be over soon! You cannot not tell your child to study, right? The stress on academics is very deep-rooted in our generation. Try as I might I cannot let go of it.

  7. I never get tensed during exams, it transpires to children which may not be good for them in the long run! I think – Exams and marks need to be considered as a break to normal studies and not pressure, So I never make it look like a big deal. after we get the results we sit down to analyse where the mistake was and what is to be improved. This way I have always achieved tension free results..
    Menaka Bharathi has recently published

    1. You've achieved parenting Nirvana I'd say :-). That is a wonderfully clinical approach – We'll get there by and by. Thanks for dropping by.

  8. Hey! With kids exams going on, trying to think of something else must be a taboo I guess! And life is all about finding happiness in small things! I'm you were happy with the way things went!

    Hope you learn Marathi soon 🙂


    1. Heh heh Geetika – I don;t think Marathi is happening anytime soon. You're right about holding onto the small things that make me happy. Trying to do just that.

  9. Keep calm and go to the Zumba class. Its good the kids are taking it better than you. Plan for your times ahead for the vacation instead 🙂

  10. Hugs Tulika. Ha ha about the happiness at seeing the husband 😉 I can relate to that right now. As for the kids, I know it's easy to say don't stress but it's very hard to follow through. So hang in there and do some deep breathing when things get tough. As for the kids, I think they will find their own balance soon enough.

    I need to write a post on how we handled exams. Or more specifically, how Gy breezed through and how I stressed over them this time. But the lessons are many. She follows the CBSE curriculum though, but I think the principles may still apply.

  11. I believe this CCE curriculum of CBSE is the culprit. The SA1 just got over on 27th of last month and the FA3 is to begin on 19th October. Every month there is one exam or the other and so the kids aren't anxious like we were as children. I sit with them and make them quiz each other. That way they seem to be more attentive in order to catch the other's fault. Try it out. I know how difficult it will be for you managing them all alone. Have seen mom struggling for ten long years. Take care.

    1. The twins' school follows the ICSE board and mercifully they have just two exams but the class tests are a regular feature. I dislike the pressure and that judgement based on the marks. Oh and I'm not absolving myself of judging too.
      Mine end up squabbling if I put them together. It's only on rare occasions that they help out each other.

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