In the middle of all the mayhem of the past weeks we managed to watch Ra-1. This fact needs to be documented because this is the kids’ first SRK film, my heart throb for the longest time.
Hrit was excited because bloodthirsty boy that he is, he looks forward to any kind of action.
Naisha was excited because of Chamak Chalo.. the song not Kareena (who Hrit calls Kaneera).
I was excited about a blue-eyed SRK besides I do so love the whole theatre experience.
The Husband, poor unwilling soul, was dragged along complaining about having to pay through his teeth for three hours of torture.
We settled down, 3D glasses on our noses and popcorn tubs in our laps. Five minutes into the film and Naisha asked,
“Mama when will Ram, Lakshman come?”
Ram Laksham??? “There are no Ram Lakshman in the film,” said I.
“Then who will kill Ravan?” she persisted.
“G-1, will,” said I.
“Who is G-1?”
“Keep quiet and watch the film,” said I.
She mercifully turned to The Husband who I think, was glad of any distraction.
Hrit, who had so been looking forward to all the mar-dhad, discovered he wasn’t such a braveheart after all. Just as RA-1 came alive he threw down his popcorn and jumped onto my lap. He proceeded to dig his face in my lap (along with the two pairs of glasses) with fistfuls of my T-shirt in both hands. Amidst his chants of “Let’s go back” I glanced to my right, worried about Naisha. There she sat cool as cucumber, crossed legs, munching her popcorn.
Finally when G-1 arrived Hrit disentangled himself and exclaimed, “You ate up my popcorn,” which might have been true considering it had been ages since I had the caramelised version.
The rest of the film was pretty uneventful. Of course not counting the periodic dropping of the 3D-glasses. I spent half the time on all fours, mobile in hand, looking for them among tons of popcorn under the seats. The lenses would come out of the frame making my task ever more exciting and challenging.
The kids enjoyed the film, The Husband refused to comment. I, of course was glad I came, just for old time sake. Besides, considering the kind of films SRK is making, if even his loyal fans stop coming to the theatre he’d be soon out of business.
I do so wish he’d make something nice, something sweet and romantic and I wish he’d stop trying so hard to be ‘young’ and ‘cool’. I wish he’d stop using — cliches South Indians have Golliwog hair, those noodles with curd, the ‘aiyyos‘ and that fake South Indian accent.. just so not him. I wish he’d stop trying to please everyone — Karva Chauth in a sci-fi film, Kareena’s thesis on abuses …. pleeeeze.. it’s not even funny.
Still waiting for a proper, real SRK film.. or maybe I’ll just watch the old ones. “Dil toh Pagal Hai” tops the list, still.
PS: The blue-eyed SRK was definitely cute.
