grandparents Archives - Page 2 of 2

08/12/201315/04/2017

Memories

I started creating you right when I was a baby
and you’ve stayed with me always unless when I’m asleep, maybe.

You come in all flavours.. Sweet, sour, bitter

Some of you are fleeting, while some of you are bigger.

Dear memories you do love to play hide and seek.

Sometimes I need to dig you out and sometimes you refuse to leave.

That time when the teacher questioned me, and again in the exam hall

When I looked for you desperately where were you all?

Then I had my heart broken and I wanted you all gone

but you didn’t move an inch, you stubbornly stayed on!

Ah memories!

Then I saw my grandma when Alzheimer’s struck.

I watched her forget …
the children she’d nurtured, the home she’d made.
Like a baby, yet not one, she forgot to eat and to dress.
One minute she’d hug you, next she’d look through
and then she’d ask.. Little girl, who are you?

I watched my Dad’s heartbreak and my mum’s helplessness
as they fed her and bathed her and took her for a walk.
Sometimes they’d simply sit and listen to her talk.

I watched as she fought to get a grasp of you
but you remained elusive.
You’d come in flashes and then disappear

Just in reach yet just not there.

Now I know you are priceless

Good, bad, ugly, beautiful, sad, happy

every bit of you is to be cherished

for every bit of you

has a bit of me.

Note: I started this off as a fun thing because I had no clue what to write for today’s prompt, Memory. And then as I went on I remembered my grandmother who suffered from Alzheimer’s. She was the sweetest, most uncomplicated, most affectionate lady ever. And I realised how precious memories were, all of them, and how lost we’d be without them.. even the bad ones.

Thank you Write Tribe.. And yes I’m in.

Linking….

For some great takes on ‘Memory’, go here. And if you’ don’t know what I’m talking about and are looking for more details on this amazing Festival of Words go here.

18/10/201121/06/2018

Dad’s on his way

Yay!! My dad’s coming. There’s plenty of excitement and we’re all preparing in our own ways.

I kick started my Diwali cleaning with the kids’ room, which doubles as the guest room, since they still sleep with us. Managed to dispose off a sack of their old toys and the room looks so spacious.

N’s been asking me..”May I ask Nanu what he’s getting for us?” and then despite my very firm, “NO” she goes ahead and asks him and then adds, “Get something for H bhai also.” This, despite the fact that they’ve been at each others’ throats all day.

H refused to go to play even when his friends came to call him. He said, very importantly, “I can’t come I’m helping mama clean the room for nanu.” All he really did was watch and get in the way.

That didn’t prevent him from telling the neighbour’s daughter that “My nanu is coming tomorrow, don’t come to my home and mess it up. I’ve helped mama clean it.”

I wonder whether H’s excitement is because of Nanu or the ‘boy doll’ he’s getting. H likes to play with dolls as long as they’re boy dolls. ‘Play’ involves either wrestling with it or tossing it up in the air so that it gets stuck on the fans or pelmets.

The kids started their three week Diwali holidays.. three weeks, isn’t that crazy? I haven’t been able to locate a Diwali camp to keep them occupied. God help me!

Editing to add: Did that post two days back and forgot to publish it. So well, Papa is here and life’s great. He carried two box fulls of Mithai… which I have proceeded to demolish systematically, aided marginally by H. I’ve rationalised my sweet orgy with the thought that I need to finish it all before The Husband gets back. He’s travelling for a few days. He’s diabetic, you see, and his sugar levels have been up over the past month. Loving wife that I am, I have to save his life even if I endanger my own. Hee hee. So what if I don’t take Karva Chauth seriously, I do love The Husband. Must get that mithai finished.
The weightloss, needless to say, has suffered… 200gms up in a day. Thankfully the gentleman trainer got the weighing machine functional so at least I know where I stand.

Day four of the holidays and the kids are already beginning to drive me crazy. More on that in my next post.

02/04/201015/04/2017

When I’m a grandmom

Never forget that they are not your children. You’ve had your turn now it’s theirs.

Never criticize anybody – son, daughter, the in-laws, children. As far as you’re concerned they are perfect.

Offer advice only if it’s asked for.

Don’t pop around all the time without being asked for.

Try to make visits fun, and think of interesting things to do with the grandchildren.

Remember all birthdays and exam times, and always offer congratulations when they are due.

Always respect the rules of your grandchildren’s parents.

If you see that they are in difficulties of any kind, don’t criticize offer to help.

Never show favouritism. You may have favourites (grandparents are only human), but keep them to yourself and let nobody guess.

Never undermine the parents.

Never be competitive with other grandparents – it’s not grownup and it’s pointless.

Try to be useful — and fun.

Think of a role you can play and nobody else can.

Taken from Things I wish my mother had told me by Lucia Van Der Post

15/03/201015/04/2017

Dadu dadi gone

My in-laws left today and as expected Hrit Naisha were pretty upset when they woke up. They had no idea they were leaving early morning. No goodbyes, no see-you-soons. I think that bothered them a lot. I told them Dadu Dadi had gone to bua’s house.

Here’s what Naisha said,
“It’s okay mama. They need to rest. We have been really troubling you these last few days I think that’s why they went away.”

She hadn’t been feeling well over the last few days and she’d been very very cranky. I was taken by surprise that she was aware she hadn’t been a ‘good girl’. Surprising and touching.

09/03/201015/04/2017

Dadu Dadima are here

Papa and mummy are here and no one could be happier than Hrit and Naisha. When Hrit woke up, the first thing he said was, “mama should I run and see if Dadu, dadima are still there.”
Naisha agreed to let mummy feed her.. a first. And she chats away non stop. She was telling her, “Dadi jab main kuchh sweet baat karti hoon toh mama kehti hai main dadima hoon.” Can’t deny she does chat like a dadima often.
While leaving for school she’s telling papa and mummy, “Apna dhyan rakhiyega.” Gawd!