Diwali is where the home is

Yessss! I won. The kids did it for me this time. Here’s what the judge Bhawna of An Indian Summer had to say about my post.

Tulika: I relived my train journeys to Lucknow as a child through your post. Not that I travelled without a reservation ;-) , but the experience of taking a night train and then taking the rickety auto rickshaws (what are they called again?) once out of the railway station – all came back to me. The fact that you made it for Diwali as a surprise – I am sure, it must be your family’s favorite dinner table story :) . But the winning stroke of your post was the gorgeous handiwork of your four year old twins! Thanks for sharing the early works of the two very talented artists currently residing in your home! :)

Pic Courtesy: Google Images

There’s something about Diwali that makes me want to go home. And each year I did, for many many years. All was well till I was in Delhi.. home was a night’s journey away and life was cool. Then I moved to Bombay. I thought I was all grown up and could handle being away from home. A few weeks to Diwali and the longing started. I can handle it, I reiterated, I’m a big girl. Diwali got closer. Activity in office hotted up, more so because I was in the business of stocks. Brokers poured in with gifts and sweets. Everyone, yes everyone seemed to be headed home. They waved their reservation tickets proudly. Everyone else seemed to be perpetually on the phone checking their reservation status. I didn’t even have a ticket. The longing kicked in real bad.

A week before, I became desperate. Of course by then reservations were full and there was no chance I was ever getting home other than by travelling on the train roof, something I wasn’t really keen on doing. Then, like a messenger from God, I got a call from an ex classmate who was also going to Lucknow and had tickets to spare. I shamelessly piled on along with another friend, double pile on. Then I discovered all his tickets were waitlisted. “They will get confirmed”, he assured us, “my uncle’s in the Railways”. The three of us reached the station only to find the uncle had failed us – just one ticket had been confirmed.
Interestingly, the moment other passengers realise you do not have a valid ticket you become an outsider and they tacitly gang up against you, and so they did. Oh I’ll never forget those scornful stares that seemed to say, “Aajkal ke ladke ladkiyan….” followed by thoughts of unmentionable things they were capable of. They checked the locks and chains on their luggage as if we would make off with it all. We sat through it, closing our eyes and ears to everything, chatting about our respective jobs and reminiscing college days.
Then the TT came along and we seemed to be in imminent danger of being thrown out. We talked and pleaded, argued and haggled to be allowed to just sit in the compartment. We did have one seat, didn’t we? The ‘uncle’ came to our rescue. Name dropping does wonders in India and we had our permissions. The TT retired grudgingly saving the worst stare for me.
That 26 hour journey squeezed together on a single seat with two boys is unforgettable.
I was given the privileged window seat by my chivalarous friends. By 10 the co-passengers switched off the lights and by 10.30 I was nodding off too. By 11 I was longing to stretch my legs and by 11.30 I was wondering why I came at all. I rested by head at the window and stretched out my legs sprawling on my one third seat. My head rolled with the train’s pace and its steady rhythm seemed to say.. sleep sleep sleep.. except there was to be no sleep.
The night was interminable. We got off at every platform through the night, welcoming the sounds of “chai chai”. Drinking endless cups of tea gave us something to do. Somewhere during the early hours we all fell asleep in one tired heap. We woke up on Diwali day with the muted morning sun upon us through the dark glass windows. The co-passengers seemed in a much better humour. Perhaps the morning cup of tea had warmed them, or maybe it was just the relief that we weren’t the goondas they’d thought us or was it simply the miracle of Diwali… they struck up human conversations with us. By 9.30 the train ambled onto the platform. We said our goodbyes and hopped onto rickshaws. That was another first.. a pampered me had always had my dad receive me at the station.. but this was different.. it was meant to be a surprise.
Anyone who’s sat on a cycle rickshaw knows of its dawdling nawabi pace. By the time I reached home I was almost hopping on the seat from frustration and excitement. That homecoming will always be very very special.
I don’t think I have it in me to do it again, ever. But that year I did get home…. and it was well worth it. The look on my mom’s face when she saw me made it MORE than worth it.
Afterword:
I kept up the trend for many years even after I was married. Diwali saw me making my way from Delhi, Mumbai, Bhopal, Pune.. wherever I was, all the way home and it was always worth it.. always. Things changed only after I had my twins. I leave you with some pictures of their handiwork this Diwali.
Hard at work
The finished products

A diya streamer

Some of their Diwali cards
If this seems a tad drab remember it was done entirely by the kids (other than lighting the candles) for I was down with fever on Diwali day this year and couldn’t leave the bed

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It’s a tough road to travel

Try anything worthwhile and there are a hundred roadblocks and so it is with trying to stick to a sensible diet. Here’s my list of the toughest pitfalls.

Picture courtesy Google images
Kids.. They are the biggest roadblocks of all. It was all much much easier before they came along. I’d simply NOT keep fattening stuff at home. Our fridge never had butter or cheese or chocolate sauce or Nutella (yum). Not so now. I have to keep the fridge stocked with all of those plus mithais and sweets. It’s so easy to pop in a chocolatey, gooey éclair each time you pass the fridge. What’s worse, I have to make stuff they love which is invariably fattening.. aaloo paranthas, French fries, puri-aaloo, pastas loaded with cheese, groan…. And then I have to say ‘Eat Eat Eat’ to them while saying, “DON’T EAT DON’T EAT DON’T EAT” to myself. What a trial.
What do I do: Well I make watered down versions for myself. A muli parantha for me when it’s aloo paranthas for them.. a pasta dish heavy on veggies minus the cheese for me while they tuck into the cheesy version.
Stress…. And there is plenty of that thanks to Point No 1. Each night after we’d put the kids to sleep the husband and I would order tubs (yes tubs) of Natural’s Ice Cream (isn’t it heavenly?) and demolish the entire tub between the two of us. That was our way to relax. As soon as the kids were asleep we’d crave something scrumptious. That’s when the kgs started piling on.
What I do: Plan. I now keep something low fat and delicious for the night. I get the maid to chop fruit or I make some yummy honey/lemon tea. Well it’s not a Natural’s tub but we make do.
Weekends: All week I’d be carefully counting calories… avoiding anything that was remotely fattening. Then along comes the weekend and I think I can relax a bit and bang… my dieting takes a plunge. All my calculations go for a toss.
What I do: Again, planning seems to make it better.
Parties… All those birthdays I go to thanks to… yes once more it’s Point No 1.. and the yummy foods on display… all of it necessarily fattening. Tough to resist.
What I do: I choose the lesser evil… Make a beeline for the salads, pile up the raitas, missi roti over puris, mixed veggies over koftas.
Formal dos… These are worse than regular parties where you can hide and escape…. Husband’s boss’ party or at the in-laws (specially if they’re new ones), and the boss’ wife/MIL saying — Why aren’t you eating? Oh come on.. you can diet another day. Have some kheer, na. Dead dead dead.
What I do: I load my plate with everything on offer.. yes everything. Then I eat just the healthier stuff while letting the dangerous things rest on the plate. Then when the dinner is winding down I quietly dump all of it. Wastage ..I know. But then I read somewhere, “It’s better to let food go to waste than go to waist.”
That’s it then for now… eat well and eat carefully.
PS: Incidentally one of my favourite quotes is “Everything I like is either illegal, immoral or fattening”
BTW there’s a page on FB by that title too. Talk about like-minded people.

Copying is not all easy

My copycat son picked up a bad one yesterday. He saw someone at school licking their fingers to flip pages… that’s a lousy one and yes I’m sure it was at school (We had a dragon of a librarian and even now if I ill treat a book her disapproving face swims before my eyes, so no chance of that happening at home).
He, however, didn’t quite get the hang of it. Yesterday during homework time he was busily turning pages.. licking the fore finger of his left hand and turning pages with the fore finger of the right hand.. lick with one turn with the other.. lick n turn… lick n turn.

Just Naisha

Naisha the adult
The maid is leaving for the day… Bye didi.. apna dhyan rakhiyega.
Papa’s leaving for work… Papa bye.. Be nice. Then to me… ‘Be nice’ means don’t do anything naughty.
Sonam Kapoor on the telly. Pretty girl.. isn’t it mama?
++++++++++
Naisha the responsible girl
The power goes off. She comes running in.. flip flip flip.. she runs around the house switching off lights and fans. “Mama,” says she, “Quick switch off the lights and fans.. power’s gone”.
It starts raining.. she runs from room to room checking if all the windows are shut.
When did she get so grown up?
++++++++++++
Naisha the mama
The kids come out from their room with bags slung on their shoulders and move purposefully to the balcony..
Me: What are you doing?
N: I am going to the gym and bhai is going to office.
Me: Why aren’t you going to office?
N: I have small babies at home.. I can’t go to office till they are older.
Back from a trip I’m tired. I put on the television for the kids (who are of course NEVER tired) and lie down to rest. Naisha saunters in, “Mama mama, oooh mama is sleeping”, she whispers.. She walks out on tiptoe shutting the door behind her. “Bhai I think mama is tired… don’t make a noise.”
+++++++++++
Naisha the baby
N: Mama I don’t think I’ll have children
Me: Why?
N: Because when you have children you have so much work. I’m so small I’ll get tired.
Me: You don’t need to have children right away. You can wait till you are older..
N: Okay then.. but mama you must promise that when I have a daughter you’ll get an empty frock for her.
Me: Empty frock?
N: Yes so that I can draw something pretty on it with my glitter pen.
+++++++++++++++
Naisha the drama queen
Brother-sister have a fight. He bites her on her shoulder. She bawls. I rush to the spot, scolding him applying cream to her. After eons she gets up… “Oh mama it hurts.. I can’t even walk straightly. I can’t even sit.. I can only stand”.. pause for effect… “on one leg”.

Happy birthday Shanti

It was the kids’ masi’s birthday and I decided to take them shopping for her. When you have kids.. anything you do… anything .. might have repercussions you haven’t even dreamed of.
The new clothes made Naisha decide that her ‘daughter’ must have a birthday too and hence new clothes. And so we are today celebrating Shanti’s birthday. Since she came to us when Naisha was two… she is today, two and a half years old.
We had some Diwali finery left over and I could fashion a skirt quite bridal in its glory and a scarlet dupatta too. It was some achievement considering the only stitch I know is the running stitch.
To my credit Naisha was almost crying from happiness at the ensemble. She pestered me for an earring and when I pointed out Shanti doesn’t have ears I was firmly put in place saying “It’s not for the ears it’s for her forehead.” Shanti has to wear a mang tikka for her birthday.
She looked quite pretty, really.
Little mama made much of her darling hanging all over her saying “Shantu which is your favourite colour?” Shantu what gift do you want?” then collected an assortments of gifts.. a chocolate, a pair of chappals, a pack of bindis, a mask left over from a birthday party, the drawing of a cake, a piece of ribbon which is Shanti’s ‘dupatta’. She then asked the brother, “What are you getting for my daughter?” to which he replied rather rudely, “Main kuchh nahin de raha hoon.” He had been pestering her for ages to come play ball with him and she hadn’t seemed keen what with the preparations for the birthday, so I can’t blame him for being a bit put off.
‘Shantu’ was then put on the ‘wheel chair’ and taken for a ride. A friend has been invited over to help. Streamers are being torn into confetti which will be thrown over Shanti as the caravan passes by. I have been called in to click pictures of the birthday girl.
The Barbies have been mercilessly thrown out of their pride of place and Shanti sits like a queen with bits of streamers all around her. The house is resounding with the birthday song.
The festivities continue…