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15/05/201115/04/2017

Shaame Awadh ….

….is just not the same this time round. Oh no I’m not going to start off on how Lucknow used to be this wonderful place and how it has changed for the worse. I’m really not one of those who leave their hometown only to come back periodically to criticize it.. uff the heat.. uff the crowd.. uff the narrow roads.. uff no roadsense at all.

No no.. that’s not me. However this time round the famous Awadh evenings bear a jaundiced look. Lucknow is crazily dusty. The entire city seems to have been dug up for laying some huge sewer lines. Mammoth pits follow you everywhere, flanked by yellow mountains of mud. The hot May breeze blows the mud into your hair, in your mouth and everywhere else it can possibly get to. One half of the roads has been left for the commuters. Give over some more space to vehicle parking and you’re left with a veritable strip.

‘Sawadhan’ that’s the catch word

Didn’t I say yellow was the predominant colour?

That’s right on the road

Scary, isn’t it?

The two-wheelers climb onto pavements wherever they can, leaving the pedestrians to manage the best they can. A ride on cycle rickshaws, which, by the way, are a huge favourite with the kids, can be safely classified as adventure tourism. The two wheels are never on level ground and you’re left clutching the rickshaw for dear life. If the kids are with you and you have some shopping to hold onto as well remember to carry a few extra pair of hands.

The kids are of course kicked beyond happiness. The ups and downs thrill them no end drawing shrieks of delight at every bump. I’ve had to contend with enough curious/annoyed looks from passers-by who, distracted by the kids’ glee, find themselves stumbling.

In any case our forays outside the house have been severely limited because the kids have decided to fall ill by turns. It seems like they’ve taken it upon themselves to keep me in character, making sure I don’t forget for a moment that I’m an OM. No heading out to those gorgeous shops piled with Lakhnawis, no handing over the kids to the myriad nanis and dadis, no being the dutiful daughter/DIL. They cling to me like glue during the day and keep me awake at night. Sigh!

The good news is that finally now they’re on the mend and I’m ready to step out and step out big. We’re planning this rather ambitious four-day visit to Nainital with an entourage of over 15 uncles and cousins. Keeping fingers crossed.

21/04/201115/04/2017

The real holiday begins

I’m off to Lucknow. After two-months of waiting the tickets cleared finally. Thank You, whoever you are, for cancelling your reservation and making way for us.

Really this is such a huge perk of being a SAHM. Never in all my years of working could I afford a one-month holiday. Of course I carry my work with me but it’s definitely lighter what with dadu, nanu, nanima, dadima, masi, mamas, tai, tauji and a pack of cousins to share the kids.

I’m not the only one busy what with the packing and informing the milkman and the maids, the kids have been busy too..

Naisha’s been in a tizzy making a card for masi, the two of them being members of the MAS (mutual admiration society). The card features Chhutki of Chhota Bheem fame. The great endeavour was considered important enough for her to call up masi in the middle of it all to ask for her favourite colour so it could be incorporated in the master piece. Then she asked me for an ‘envelon’ and promptly coloured that too. Naisha certainly doesn’t believe in doing things by halves. Then of course sticking to the womanly stereotype of not being capable of keeping a secret she had to call masi again and tell her that she had a ‘prize’ for her (I still haven’t been able to explain the difference between prize and surprise to her).

Hrit got all excited and wanted to make something too though he couldn’t figure out for whom. He was however sure he wanted to make it only for a boy. He finally settled for Nanu.. choosing him over his cousins and Dadu. I hope Nanu is gratified enough at this honour and the others are not overly disappointed. He drew some colourful fishes in an equally colourful ocean.

Doesn’t it resemble Hussain’s work?

And here’s what happened when we tried to impart some ‘gyan’ to Hrit…

Hrit: may I have an ice-candy
Me: Not now. I don’t want you to fall ill because we’re going to Lucknow
Hrit: Why? Don’t they have doctors in Lucknow.

The Husband: Be good when you’re there. If anyone troubles dadima, nanima, dadu or nanu they’ll be put on a train and sent away.
Hrit: Where will they be sent?
TH: You can go where ever you want to.
Hrit (Thinking hard): I think I’d like to go to Bombay.

The only catch in my happiness.. the day long train journey. Beware all you co-passengers the twins are on their way.

21/04/201115/04/2017

Tangled

Thursday Challenge: “COMPLEX” (Complicated, Tangled, Intricate, Mess,…)

Fast to cook and good to eat and the kids love it

20/04/201115/04/2017

Ten things you can do with empty bottles

The other day while cleaning up I found these bottles and was about to throw them off when they were retrieved by the kids. They then proceeded to…

1. Count them, then count the blue ones, white ones, green ones separately
2. Make formations.. circles, triangles, squares, rows.
3. Make a circle of the bottles, put toys inside and then try to retrieve the toys without knocking off the bottles.
4. Try to stack them one on top of the other (and give after some hundred tries)
5. Balance balls on them and make them into softys
6. Sell them.. the green one was a premium buy because there was just one
7. Buy them and polish bargaining skills too
8. Roll them to see whose goes farthest
9. Fill them up with ‘juice’ and set up a juice shop
10. Create a bowling alley (Biggest hit with Hrit since he loves some action)

Did someone say waste?

Serious stacking in progress

One man’s waste is another man’s toy

16/04/201112/04/2025

Letter to God

Dear God,

Why oh why did you make chaniya cholis? It would have been just one tiny thing less among your myriad miraculous creations. Do you realise what havoc you’ve caused in our household? Every birthday, every visit to the mall, to a friend’s place, to a colleague’s dinner party or sometimes even to the play ground or at home I dread that question from my daughter, ‘May I wear my chaniya choli?’

Oh ho so you’re asking why don’t I just let her? Well, imagine how she’d climb the slide in all her finery.. or how she’d kick the ball, or skip rope or how incongruous she would look if she walked into a Mc Donalds in her wedding glory… ???? Besides what would she wear when she had a real wedding to go to if she wore out everything in the playground?

Okay granted we do need chaniya cholis for weddings and suchlike but then why did you give my daughter this craving? In times of barely there hot shorts and bum-exposing microminis why should she hanker after ‘clothes that reach my toes’ (Her words not mine).

Did you see the huge scene we had yesterday? Did you see how she cried because she wanted to wear a chaniya choli at home? In my frustration and anger I told her if she continued to cry I’d get rid of each and every one of them. And then she raised her tear streaked face to me, sobbing heart-breakingly and asked, ‘Will I never ever look pretty again?’

Tell me what I should have done then? Would a lecture on the frivolity of clothes been of any use? Did I do the right thing in suspending my anger to give her a tight hug and tell her she is pretty no matter what she wore? And did you see the doubt written all over her sweet little face as she looked on unbelievingly — Could anyone really look pretty in shorts?

It’s all your fault, really. Why did you make clothes at all? Weren’t we managing fine with those fig leaves and tree barks? And if it got a tad too cold.. Well why should it get too cold? You’re God aren’t you? You could take care of that with the snap of a finger.

Imagine how many resources we would save..

— no more valuable manhours (or woman hours, for that matter) lost in contemplation of ‘what should I wear?’, or ‘Did I get it right?’
— no more garment stores taking up precious space
— no more valuable print space lost in telling us what to wear
— no more moral police telling us what not to wear
— no more mindless fashion weeks
— no more sartorial red-carpet gossip and more importantly
— no more people getting judged by what they wear

Oh I could go on and on. Do you realise this could be the way to a better world? Do something God and soon please before I lose my daughter to the inconsequential world of clothes and fashion.

Yours truly
Very Worried Mama

PS: I decided to let her have her way hoping she’d find out on her own how uncomfortable those clothes were. It was I, however, who was proved wrong. She wore it till evening. coming to me every few minutes with statements like, “Look mama I can skip rope in this dress.” and “look mama I’ve not messed it up.”

At work

After a long heart to heart I finally managed to convince her to change when it was time to go to the playground. Thank you God for small mercies.