Facilitating growth the right way

Facilitating growth the right way

I used to think children gave us grief only when they were infants. Not true at all! As they begin to grow and develop personalities of their own, trouble takes on whole new dimensions. Research says baby brain development starts right from the moment of conception. Then on, children make such rapid progress as to have you completely stumped.

The other day as I sat with N trying to explain the importance of exams and good grades she said:

Mama do you remember the time we went out for dinner to that restaurant Italy via Punjab?
Me (wondering how this fitted in with my exam gyan): Yes, I do.
N: And do you remember your marks in class 6?
Me: No, I don’t. Why?
N: See nobody remembers marks, we only remember the good times. Exams aren’t everything, you know!

Seriously? Now I’ll have a cheeky 11 year-old lecture me on how exams and grades weren’t important? I know that already, thank you. And could you get back to your studies, please?

Sometimes when they talk like this, like know-it-all mini adults, I wonder when they grew up. When did they start thinking up arguments and talking to me like equals?

I well remember the day they were born – tiny mites they were – H, at a mere 2.4kgs, was struggling with an underdeveloped lung while the 1.9 kg N was all eyes and ears, looking, listening, absorbing, even when the doctor brought her to me for that first hug.

I have to admit I was a pretty clueless new-mom. All my school friends had grown up children by then, while my work friends were mostly single or childless. I hardly read up and thought of pregnancy as one big holiday since I’d worked ever since I had left college. That wasn’t quite the right thing to do.

Have you heard of Feed IQ?

I recently came across the concept of Feed IQ. Have you heard of it? Quite literally it implies that a mom ‘feeds IQ’ to her baby through breastfeeding and also through infant brain exercises. There’s a whole list of exercises for each stage of your baby’s growth. You can look it up here.

Simply put, a new parent needs to expose his/her child to as many new experiences as he/she possibly can while giving the child time and leisure to process them at his own pace. Coupled with proper nutrition, this can boost the baby’s IQ.

First the food

I went purely on instinct back when H and N were infants and so obsessed was I about the food that my sister christened me Nirupa Roy. I worried constantly about their baby weight, because they were pre-term babies, plus because H needed to spend about two weeks in the NICU.

They picked up fast enough and I can say with some amount of pride that they are pretty non-fussy as compared to a lot of other children. My sister insists that because I ate so much lauki and cabbage during my pregnancy the children have developed a taste for it. There might be some truth in that, given that the foetus’ first taste of food is through what the mother eats.

And the brain exercises

As with food I went with instinct again, which wasn’t all bad, but I do wish I had been more organised. I’d do things differently now, prepare better perhaps, be more conscious of the fact that the children were attuned to my every mood and thought even when they were tiny foetuses.

The trick is of course, to start early.

I remember I talked to them all the time, even when they couldn’t understand much, mostly because I was often alone with them at home. I sang to them and told them stories. While Shape of You might be miles away from Nanhi Pari, I like to think their love for music stemmed from there.

I do take complete credit for their love of stories. I began by telling them about the epics then moved on to reading aloud to them. From Christopher Columbus’ discovery of America to the great Wars, they loved every bit of it, and still do. Now they’re writing stories of their own.

Going by the way they argue and counter argue; their brain seems to be developing fine. Some of it is genetics of course; we’re quite a family of ‘arguers.’ But as a parent we can facilitate their skills in a hundred small ways.

As the twins grow I see a lot of me in them. And that makes me happy except when they quote me at me to get their way.

14 Replies to “Facilitating growth the right way”

  1. Such a lovely post to read, I can just imagine my son coming up with such hilarious thoughts few years down the line. Now I know how we moms feed IQ to our babies through various means.

  2. We all learn from experience and with the vast knowledge available now, it has become easier to be better parents. And, I do hope that your kids dont quote you too often to get their way. 🙂

  3. What’s heartwarming one Tulika! N is smarty pants I look forward to these tid bits you post about conversations. Feed IQ is certainly something very important which every mom must take note of

  4. I can completely relate to your post, Tulika. Sometimes I do wonder – When did they grow up so fast? Feed IQ concept is something which is new to me but a relevant one. Good nutrition makes all the difference from the starting itself.

  5. This reminded me of how Chinese food gave me extreme nausea during my 1st pregnancy and I loved it during my second one. Now my older daughter is not too fond Chinese and my younger one loves it.
    You have rightly stated it too.. start early and provide the right kind of nutrition and we can surely help boost our babies brain development

  6. I know what you must have gone through! Babies and that too twins! I was so sure that I would mess up somewhere! I love giving new experiences to the boys and they love it. It really makes them think out of the box and boost the brain development too. And most of the times, they will come up with a solution that we never thought of 🙂

  7. Nodoubt new moms always struggle due to lack of proper Approach. This post comes handy for Feed IQ for many out there

  8. I absolutely love reading about H & N’s smart comebacks and introspections! Kids sure are way smarter today than we were at their age! It is important to note that what we as expecting and nursing moms eat, talk and how we interact with the baby, directly impacts the child’s brain development.

  9. Haha.. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this post, Tulika. The incidents you’ve shared are so hilarious, especially the first one (restaurant and marks in class 6th). God, I get jitters when I hear such stuff, how m i gonna dodge such questions. Coming to the topic, if we have fed right to our kids from day 1 we do see the results eventually. 🙂

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