10 top gifts for new moms

10 top gifts for new moms

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 Kreative Mommy Deepa asked us to list out ten gifts for new moms. Make it ‘fun and useful’ she said. So here it is, my list. A word of caution – these products have still to make their way from the realms of my brain to the inventors’ tables, so don’t go looking for them at stores just yet.

Crydecoder
Baby’s cry. They just cry. They cry for being fed and cry to be put to sleep. They cry to be held and they cry to be left alone (I had one of each kind and by the time I figured out which one wanted what I was a nervous wreck). The Crydecoder selects one of the 101 options on its dial and tells the mum exactly why the baby is crying.

Poopiesniffer

What’s the big deal with this one, you wonder? We have our noses, right? The thing is by the time the message gets to your nose it also permeates the room and gets to everyone in it. Imagine when that happens in the middle of dinner with guests. Well this gadget is equipped with odour detectors a million times more sensitive than your doggie’s nose and beeps out long before the message escapes the diaper. Trust me, the new mum needs this one.

Peepredictor

While on unsavoury topics I’ll get over with this one too. Without going into detail let me just say this gadget is designed for mums of boys. It will help a new mum predict which way the waters flow, so to say. And if you’re not fond of a sour warm spray on your face (Do NOT ask how I know that) I’d say you need this.

Time turner

We’ll borrow this one from Hermione. A new mum definitely needs more than 24 hours in her day. Gift her this and she’ll thank you forever.

Mumclone
Sometimes the time turner it just isn’t enough. Babies don’t grow up in a day and how long can mums do this back and forth? They’re only human. And so we have a – a Mumclone. It clones the mum to a baby-plus-one – One baby two mums, two babies three mums and so on. Get this and watch mum load lighten instantly.

Blinkamera
It’s not all bad you know, this being a new mum. There are compensations, lots of them. Your little one will give you plenty of heart stoppingly beautiful moments. That moment when he stares at you unblinkingly with a pensive expression on his face, the time he clasps your finger in his fist and refuse to let go, the time his tiny plump hands reaches out for you and oh when he decides to bare his gums in a toothless smile – that’s the time you’ll need the Blinkamera. This is a device that’ll click a picture with the blink of your eye and store that memory forever. The new mum doesn’t need to break the moment to rush for that physical camera – blink and click. Useful, isn’t it?

Breastmilk regulator
Now it flows now it doesn’t. Get this one and with the twist of a knob baby food is ready to be served or stored away.

Burpinducer
The twins’ Ped freaked me out with tales of babies who had choked because they hadn’t been burped properly. I spent entire nights roaming around with a fast asleep well-fed baby at my shoulder patting it on the back waiting for that burp. Yeah I’d have liked a burp inducer.

Tummytucker
So the baby is out in the world and you can’t wait to get back to your old self. Yet no matter how hard you exercise or how many crunches you put yourself through that tiny tummy bump refuses to go away. That’s where every new mum needs a tummy  tucker. Rub it on your tummy and watch it disappear. Nope you won’t find this one in the lingerie department. And No, don’t try it all over your body, it won’t work, just the baby bump.

Mumreassurer
She’s a new mum. She has tons of advice and just her gut instinct to guide her. So basically this Mumreassurer will tell her, as many times a day as she wants, that she’s doing the right thing. It comes with multiple settings. The first few days one can opt for hourly settings and then graduate to just one reassuring message a day. A must try.

Note: ‘Mum’ here denotes ‘primary care-giver’. Most products work just as well with dads or aunts. I said ‘most’.

So much for fanciful thoughts!
If you want to look up some real products for new mums do head over to  Kreative Mommy for her #MondayMommyMoments where fabulous mothers share useful practical ideas.
Kreativemommy.com
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29 Replies to “10 top gifts for new moms”

  1. Amazing list of gifts indeed.I am sure all new mom would love you if you come bearing these gifts.Not only are they useful for moms, but would help babies too!You have a gift.Thank you for sharing your ideas with us on #MondaymommyMoments

  2. OMG!!! I loved it.. hilarious list here lady; please tell me this is there in the market ;D
    for a moment I thought i’am back to J.K.Rowling’s sci-fi fantasy land. LOVE IT.

  3. That ‘s so funny.. but I wish all those should have been in market .. especially I need that pee predictor advanced one for toddlers (trying to potty train my little one 🙁 )…

  4. Please Tulika, I need that time turner and mumclone, right now. And you forgot sleepinducer and stayasleeper. Need a couple of those too. He is waking up every hour, sometime ecery half an hour since a week now. I’m in zombie mode. Help me Tulika before I transform into a zombie completely.
    Very thoughtful gifts these are. If only they were available in the store!
    Vinitha recently put up this amazing post…Being Grateful! #ChattyBlogs #WeekendCoffeeShare

    1. Aw Vinitha. I almost forgot how really hard it is with a baby. The stayasleeper would be priceless. One of mine was such a light sleeper I would switch off the doorbell lest someone wake her up. You take care. And it does get better. But you know that already.

  5. This was so funny! You must get patents for these! Lol. I love the idea of a time turner. It will be useful even later when the mom feels the baby has grown up too fast!

  6. Wow! What a perfect list! I can’t think of anything better or more fun! My kids are pretty big now and this post kind of took me back in time…those traumatic, trying times a young, new mother goes through! I am still chuckling thinking about some of those zany gadgets on a young mother’s wishlist! Baby Oye…are you listening?

    1. Exactly Kala. I went back to kids’ childhood too. It’s fun to remember their childhood and thank our stars that some of those terrifying things are behind us. Which is why the prompt was so much fun.

    1. Thanks Shailaja. I think it’s the vacations and the relaxation that makes me see the fun side of parenting. Once school starts the stress will catch up again and you’ll see all those sad/worried posts.

  7. loved this post, Tulika. Couldn’t stop laughing. That peepredictor would have helped me a lot as I got drenched in pee fountains on multiple occasions. 🙂 Blinkamera I sorely missed. They give the most beatific of expressions when you are not clicking. Mumclone and Time turner are must haves. And the last two, we would give millions for them. 🙂
    Rachna recently put up this amazing post…Constipation: The Hidden Struggle

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