Why I’m loving being Mean Mum

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“You’re done H, you can go. N you need to revise the last two chapters again,” said I wrapping up the revision for the day.
“That’s not fair, she deserves her free time too”, chirped up H.
Eh? What was that? Who was that? I looked up surprised at this vehement protest from the most unexpected quarters.
I have, many times in the past, rued the fact that the twins never see eye to eye on anything, anything at all. They have a different sets of friends and often enjoy playing different games.
Over the last few weeks, however, I’ve noticed a change – the beginning of a partnership, a truce of sorts against a common enemy. Moi!
As I’ve pushed and prodded them towards their books, they’ve ducked and dillydallied to the best of their ability and they’ve perhaps decided that they need to join forces to combat the onslaught :-).
After N finished her two extra chapters she walked off to her room and I overheard them talking, “So not fair na, we don’t even need to study so much. We can’t call our friends over even on weekends.” says he.
She nods in agreement, “I couldn’t plan a single prank for April Fools Day. And it comes just once in 365 days. Imagine! So unfair.”
Hah! I feel so smug! I cannot stop grinning.
Even as I type this they’re playing table tennis without a table, with a bouncy ball shouting in laughter during their break – the break which started out at 15 minutes and has stretched to almost an hour. I just don’t have the heart to break up their camaraderie. They talk and laugh and wrestle and play computer games together.
I am going to grab complete credit for this transformation. The truce is so charming I am almost glad of the exams. Almost. I hope it extends beyond the exams too.
And so here’s the learning for the day:
If you want your kids to become best buddies try turning into Mean Mom.

 

PS: It has the side benefit of getting their studies done and may also be useful in inculcating some great habits.

 

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45 thoughts on “Why I’m loving being Mean Mum

  • April 9, 2017 at 11:17 pm
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    Your observations may be right – they must have really joined forces to combat the onslaught.

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  • April 8, 2017 at 7:27 pm
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    I've done the iron hand in velvet glove on occasion, but I've raised such an affectionate fella that he never holds anything against me! In fact, I am the one feeling secretly guilty for being tough. Ah well…all seem so long ago now. 🙂 Are those your kids in the pic? Lovely long hair!

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    • April 13, 2017 at 3:09 pm
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      I know how that goes. I hate the guilt once the anger is gone, unless i'm faking the anger to begin with. Nope that picture isn't theirs. N has had a recent haircut and a rather really short one this time.

      Reply
  • April 7, 2017 at 1:21 pm
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    Haha! Warring siblings – i can't say I know what it feels like, but I see what you're doing and am so proud of you 🙂
    I am a mean dad..or am i ? 😉

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:55 pm
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      I cannot see you as a mean anything, definitely not as a mean dad.

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  • April 7, 2017 at 9:59 am
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    haha brilliant way to look at it! My kids really love hanging out and bonding too it is great isn't it #mg

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:55 pm
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      You're one fortunate mum is all I'm going to say.

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  • April 7, 2017 at 6:34 am
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    Yes, that's a smart and useful technique! Loved reading your post.

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  • April 5, 2017 at 5:22 pm
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    So smart of you, Tulika. It's nice when kids get along, isn't it? My sister and I were like twins, being just an year apart and we fought most of the time. But it wasn't all that bad. Now my kids are 7 years apart and one of them is only 6 months old. How they will turn out to be only time will tell. Will keep this trick in mind. 🙂

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:53 pm
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      Oh my sister and I fought too but somewhere along the way we became best friends and now we talk everyday on the phone and dream about a road trip with just each other and no one else.

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  • April 5, 2017 at 12:50 pm
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    Brilliant! Cygnet is an only child and will likely remain so, so I guess I'll never have to deal with warring siblings. Reverse psychology is great though. Pen x #mg

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:52 pm
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      I'm sure bringing up an only child comes with its own challenges but you are spared the fights, so that's something.

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  • April 5, 2017 at 7:40 am
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    Super smart….even if it means that you have to turn into Cruella sometimes, the camaraderie among your kids makes it all worth while!!

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:51 pm
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      Definitely. It's worth it. Thanks for dropping by.

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  • April 4, 2017 at 12:35 pm
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    Haha. I am referee at present. Let me become mean referee now. I also noticed when they have different choices and they want me to decide on it, I put the onus on them. I tell them to agree among themselves and let me know what they decide. It helps them to learn negotiation and I am spared implementing something one of them do not like.

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:50 pm
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      Oh my goodness I've been trying to do that for ages Ls. I step in only when it escalates beyond a point.

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  • April 4, 2017 at 12:27 pm
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    Super cute! This is one thing I'll take your word for since Gy is the only kid. I'm mean mom most of the time anyway. She still loves me. So far.

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:50 pm
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      Kids can always see through it all – the love through the meanness.

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  • April 4, 2017 at 5:59 am
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    This is so funny. I wish I had a cute sibling story to narrate, but my brother is much older, and always on my parents' side. So it was usually all three of them against poor me!

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:48 pm
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      Aw that's such a waste of a sibling – though good that you have three people looking out for you.

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  • April 3, 2017 at 8:47 pm
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    Hahahah, thats funny Tulika. I an even remember my own two kids- at some point starting to gang up against me…. know what I mean?:-) they are just too clever that 's what they are – with so smart moms as ourselves – what to expect though:-) hahah

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    • April 7, 2017 at 8:04 am
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      Always take credit for all the desirable qualities in our kids, right Eli? Hahaha! 😀 😉

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:47 pm
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      Ha ha of course Eli, Chicky – we're all for grabbing credit.

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:56 pm
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      No I'm not, this here is serious business.

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  • April 3, 2017 at 4:41 pm
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    This is so cute and funny at the same time! And of course, very clever of you! What better way to unite kids than to be a mean mum 😛

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:46 pm
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      I cannot take complete credit because that's not how it started but I like the way it ended.

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:46 pm
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      Hey Corinne I need you on my side. Don't cross over pretty please.

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  • April 3, 2017 at 12:16 pm
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    That's just so cunning! Let's hope they don't find this post and get wise to you 🙂

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:44 pm
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      They don't yet read my blog so thank goodness for that.

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  • April 3, 2017 at 9:33 am
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    Haha…that's deviously clever. I do remember my sister and I bonding over the unfairness of our parents. But then again, she seemed to be their favourite so it was usually me against her!

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:44 pm
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      Aw Sanch, nothing like a sister to bond with. As for favourites – I think each of thinks the other one is the favourite one. Ask your sister.

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  • April 3, 2017 at 8:50 am
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    Ahh that's a smart thing to do. I'll keep this tactic in mind 🙂

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    • April 7, 2017 at 2:42 pm
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      Ha ha Naba. I didn't begin to plan it but it worked to my advantage.

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  • April 3, 2017 at 8:47 am
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    Aha! That's a smart way to deal with two warring kids. It's like two birds, one stone and all 😀

    Reply

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